Saturday, May 30, 2009

A tribute to Avril Lavigne and Lean Cuisines...

"You don't always have to do everything right... Walk around with your hands up in the air like you don't care..." -lyrics from Avril

This is how I feel today, and today this is how I feel. 

I've come to a point of realization-

I am beautiful no matter what the mirror says.

I am happy, no matter what my circumstance says. 

I am helplessly in love and devoted, even when we fight.

If I never get another record deal, I'm still going to make music. It's what I do.

If I want to eat cookies, I can.

If I want to eat french fries, I will.

I've had my wakeup call.

Some think it's crazy to spend a bunch of money on frozen foods, but Lean Cuisines are one of the best friends a bad cook can have. I'm not claiming this over myself forever. I've really not put any effort in to being a good one, to be honest. They suit me just fine... 

I'm on pursuit to find stamps to mail my bills. Later, I'm celebrating the birth of a very dear friend of mine. Tomorrow, I will join my fellow believers in worshiping our Lord. There's a possibility that I'll be in the studio during the afternoon. And in the evening, I'll retrieve my beautiful mother from the airport. 

Next week offers many promises and prayers answered.

I'll keep you updated.

God is good!!


Sunday, May 17, 2009

Blessed Sunday!

It's Sunday morning. I'm sitting on the couch, staring out in to God's beautiful creation through the many windows that illuminate the walls of my new loft. 

I've made several mental notes, reminding myself to update the blogspot. I'm finally getting around to doing it. Praise God. :)

This week has been life-changing. We had a women's conference at church all week. Tuesday night prayer, I missed. However, I attended Wednesday through Friday night services, and also the ladies luncheon yesterday held at the Hilton in Woodland Hills. 

I had so many revelations about love, honor, and purity. With knowing God's desires for us, I have a newfound appreciation and reverence toward His grace. It's very easy to get caught in the motions of "playing church," but friends, I'm here to tell you that God became real to me again this week. He had me weeping on my knees Thursday night. His power absolutely put me beside myself. There's nothing more riveting or inspiring than to see His presence move through the hearts of the congregation, and women crying out with thanksgiving. The shouts of joy were enough to send chills up anyone's spine.

I was in such a state of reverie after the week of events that last night I was unable to sleep. I downloaded music from itunes to put on my ipod so I'd have new listening material for the gym. I then realized I was two hours past closing time, so I took little Missy for a run to the local Ralph's grocery and back. Like I twittered, it probably wasn't the safest idea. However, the incline was incredible. I'm definitely feeling it in my rear this morning. 

I think I finally put my head to the pillow around 5am. Knowing I had to be on stage this morning at 7:50, I set my alarm for 6:40. Sure enough, I awoke to a car alarm going off under my building around 10min past 8am. My eyes still feel like sandpaper, but God is good. I'll be there to serve at the 11am and 1pm services. 

Michael, my love, has gone back to work at Saddle temporarily. He's such an awesome man of God. As much as it was a challenge to return, He didn't back down in fear. He stood up with an uncompromising integrity, and walked straight in to that dark place with the strength of His Lord and Savior. He's confessing the Name before every person he meets. I'm in constant prayer that the Word washes him daily; purifies him daily from the things let in through his eye and ear gate while slaving until the wee hours of the morning. Please be in agreement that he's delivered soon. I know this is only part of the testimony God will use to His glory!! I'll keep you updated. 

Concerning my publishing deal, it looks as if we're at the tail/end of negotiations with Sony. It's been difficult to not fall in to Satan's trap of anxiety. God's revealed Himself faithful in showing me that in stillness-- you really can find peace. When He says in His Word, "According to your faith, be it unto you," He means it. There's a difference in hoping for something and having faith in it. Having faith in any given situation moves God from the future to the present. For example, if you're sick and I say, "I hope God heals you," I'm hoping that in the future God will heal you. However, if I say, "I believe God at His Word and have faith that you are healed, in Jesus' name," that's the faith in the now-- walking by faith, rather than by sight. That's what we're called to do. See the difference? It's a big one.

I pray you all have a blessed Sunday. Thanks for reading!

My love,